Wedding Buyer’s Remorse?

So I just returned from visiting San Diego. My family and I headed out there for my cousin’s wedding. Being that her wedding was just 6 weeks out from my own wedding, and being that I’ve attended only a handful of weddings in my life, I really did not know what to expect. It wasn’t until I got there that I realized this glamorous California wedding was going to put my little Illinois wedding to shame…

My cousin’s wedding was held on an island in San Diego that looked out over the Pacific Ocean. She had a wedding planner (as opposed to moi, early referenced bridezilla who made all my own centerpieces, programs, etc.). She had a 6 piece professional band (as opposed to my DJ who when I complained about the music on my wedding day refused to change it, saying, “it’s not just your wedding, it’s my reputation”). Even the speeches were significantly better. Much, but not all of this, was due to the fact that her budget was significantly higher than mine.

And so, for a few minutes (okay hours), instead of enjoying the day and being happy for my cousin, I found myself comparing just about everything. It drove me nuts. Maybe I should have gotten the photo booth. Maybe I should have printed dinner menus. Maybe, maybe, maybe…. It is obviously too late for all of that. (In theory) we only get one wedding and I can’t change mine.

Later, as I drove to the airport, I stared at the California mountains, thinking about just how beautiful they were… Then, I thought to myself, why don’t I live here?! It certainly beats 100 inches of Wisconsin snow! But after thinking about it some more, I realized that I would never be happy in California. Don’t get me wrong, it’s beautiful, it’s just not me (that and the fact the Californians piss me off). And then came the Mr. Roger’s moment—neither wedding was better… they were just different. Equally special and equally different. I don’t know why it took me so long to figure that out.

So, in the end, the moral of the story is an obvious one: comparisons will drive you nuts. Other couples will have better weddings, better cars, better houses, etc. While sitting in my crappy little apartment in Wisconsin, I will be busy reminding myself that while happy cows may come from California, the simple yet elegant ones come from Wisconsin.