Don't Make Me

While pursuing a Women's/Health website today, I was asked to categorize myself as one of the following:

• College Student
• Bride-to-be
• New Mother
• 40+

I don't want to be a femme Nazi and I don't really think that women should do everything men can-- just because we can. Sure I want to be able to vote, go to college, have a career, comparable pay, etc. But I don't think women can do everything as well as a man can and I don't think men can do everything as well as a woman. And that is OK by me. What's not OK is being asked to categorize myself into one of these four "life stages" as if its all we can obtain.

As I ran through the list, I quickly determined that I didn't belong at either end of the spectrum since I am a college grad (yea!) and not yet 40 (double yea!). Settling in the middle I focused on Bride-to-be. Hmm doesn't fit. OK, New Mother.. uhhh, let's try the other. Bride-to-be..... still no. New Mother- definitely not. Where do I fit?

This couldn't have come at a more ripe time. I've been recently mentioning to friends that I feel out of sync with them. Some of my friends are getting married; others are trying for babies, talking about babies, or otherwise babycentric; and still others already have babies. I feel more awkward and out of place than when I was the only fifth-grader with a d-cup under wire "training" bra.

What bothers me the most is that being a young pseudo-professional didn't seem to warrant a category. On a Women's/Health website one would think this would garner all of the attention for one simple reason: We don't have one fing excuse to not be at the top of our game. No babies, mothers-in-law, or groomzillas to distract us from our personal best.

And then it dawned on me. Perhaps we aren't the ones in need of all the help....